August 17, 2010 *unpredictable.so sudden. unfair*

It was August 14, 2010 when we received a super bad news. My tito called us over the phone and told my mom that Tita Ana had a heart attack and she was in a critical condition. We were all shocked and panicked. Mom was crying when she heard it and suddenly went to the hospital with my sister. I asked mom what had happened, and the rest was history.

I got depressed since the day my tita had a heart attacked. I couldn't imagined that it will happened. My mom is the one who got so affected, I got worried for her, she always cried, not eating her meals, and absent-minded. We're still praying for my tita's recovery, but the doctor said that, even she if she'll awake, she will be in paralyzed or the term 'lantang-gulay' , and it makes us so worried, we're not yet ready for it. NAPAKABILIS NG MGA PANGYAYARI. Before that incident, my tita is happy, no more signs of sickness or what, she's jolly.

And then August 17 of the same year, we received a call from the hospital, my tita was being survived through CPR. She was on 50-50 condition. My mom was in the hospital by that time, and my sister called me and we went on the hospital together. That was my first time that I visited there. My tita's sons was there, her husband, and my titos . They were all crying when we got there, I went to the ICU to see my tita, she was like sleeping, her doctor was monitoring her vital signs, no more changes in short no more chances! The doctor was just waiting for my tito to sign, but my tito didn't want to. He didn't want to accept the fact that my tita will die. But, we have no choice. My mom was talking to my tita's DEAD body crying!, yeah it was 10:00pm when the doctor announced the time of death. It was my first time to see infront of my eyes that kind of scenario. sa TV ko lang yun napapanuod. Hindi ako naghagulgol, I just had a teary eye. si mommy talga yung naghahagulgol, nagwawala, sinusubukan nyang gisingin si tita, sinsabi bakit daw sya iniwan, wla na daw sya kaibigan, kapatid, kabonding. NAKAKAIYAK LALO :'(( I was there when she died!! It was traumatic. I was speechless. nagwawala ung pinsan ko, halos di na makahinga si mommy kakaiyak. We're tryng to stop her pero hindi talga mapigilan. Angs sakit kasi hindi talaga inaasahan yung ganung panyayari. Life is so unpredictable. Kung oras mo na, oras mo na talaga, sometimes, life is so unfair. Before she dies no more premonitions, it was really so sudden!

Today is my tita's 1st death anniversary, too sad my mom isn't here. I miss my tita so much, she used to be my mom, she's a jolly person. Ang hirap mawalan ng taong minamahal. It really hurts! I cen feel the pain that my mom and my tita's family is suffering, until now, hindi parin matanggap yung nangyari.

Natatakot na ulit ako mamatayan ng importanteng tao sa buhay ko. AYOKO na maranasan yung nangyari nung nakaraang taon. I don't want to see my love ones dying. Sino bang may gusto? kahit sino din naman ayaw. Minsan naisip ko, sana hindi nalng namamatay yung tao. Pero kailangan natin tanggapin na ang buhay ay hiram lamang natin, at dun din tayo hahantong balang araw. Ang kailangan lang gawin ay maging handa, at paguunawa sa katotohanan. Kaya habang buhay pa yung mga mahal natin sa buhay, wag natin ito sayangin. Kung may mahal tayong tao, sabihin natin, there's nothing wrong saying 'I Love You' to our love ones, especially to our parents. Habang nabubuhay pa sila iparamdam natin kung gano natin sila kamahal. Baka sa huli magsisi tayo Just like what happened to my cousins. Life is too short, we should make out of it.